Tuesday, January 22, 2008

the rising tide

Well this one freaked me out a little.

The dream starts off with me on my bike on a country road. I am in third person which is fairly common for most of my dreams. I come to an intersection and hang a left towards a small little community. At the intersection there is an older black man carrying a large bag of raisins...yeah. I offer to help him carry it and i do so until we get to the little gas station/convenience store.

I drop off the bag and go inside. At this point i kinda forget the chain of events. I feel like it was something either violent or dramatic in some degree. I leave unabated though.

From here i flash to a house with a single man inside. This is actually a scene from a movie that my subconscious is throwing together for me. The man is being played by Tommy Lee Jones ( i saw a commercial for no country for old men before beddy time ). The backstory is inherently known to me. He is a Vet from the korean war era. He somehow was discharged dishonorably and know uses his ex military status to dubious means. These dubious means include a variety of costumes he owns that he uses in staged stunts that he is contracted by various individuals for.

Then i flash back to my third person self. I am now in the "movie" and my character meets someone at the previously mentioned convenience store. After a romantic interest is determined i decide to relocate to this quiet little community. But where will i live??

Flashing back to the lonley Jones. He is found by some person who he has wronged in his distant past. They knock him out and when next he is awake he finds himself inside the landing gear of a now descending plane. The gear opens and he falls and grabs onto the gear at the last moment. He notices he has a parachute pack attached to his back so obviously instead of waiting for the plane to land he lets go and parachutes to a nearby house.

His chute opens late and he injures himself as he hits the ground going too fast. He feigns amnesia and the house takes him in to nurse this stranger back to health.

Flashing back to third person me I find a newly abandoned house. This will do just fine. There is a quick scene shortly after with me and her on a sleigh in snowy winter just as snug as sugar plums. The movie is supposed to take place over the months of Fall, Winter and Spring as each of our transformations take place. The name of the movie was going to be "The Coming Summer". I'll get to why that name creeped me out.

This is about where the ridiculous movie plot ends. I was soooo looking forward to the blossoming ups and downs of my new third person romantic comedy and the trials and redemption of the tommy lee jones character...le sigh.

Anyways things come back to me and my parents and my grandmother just outside of the house of the estranged Jones. My mom makes some weird comment about getting right with jesus. While my mother is a practicing southern baptist these comments are out of line with her character. It's much more in line with my grandmother to make guilt laced comments about my eternal fate.

Well then i look up in the sky and see one of the most amazing dreamscape views i can recall in recent memory. It was a picturesque day and up in the clouds were these 2 creatures. They had to be hundreds of feet long b/c they were definitely in the clouds and stretched at least the distance of 10 jumbo jets or more.

One was long and eel like. It snaked through air very much like an eel too. I assumed this one to be female. The other was slightly longer but was flat like a manta ray. I say "like" a ray b/c it wasn't nearly as wide proportionately. Actually it looked like it had the body of the first one except with flattened fins that stretched the length of its body. I would say it was about 5 to 6 times wider than the first. It also undulated more like a mammalian sea creature instead of side to side motions like the more eel like creature. It was also "flying" upside down so instead of its belly i was looking at its top side.

I finally stopped gaping and grabbed my camera and took some pictures as i ran underneath them. Then i started filming footage with my camera. Thats when a handful more of the eel like creatures and 1 more of the manta rayish things appeared. They were all swimming together in the sky. It was completely terrifying and awe-inspiring.

Then i noticed there were gigantic sea turtles swimming with them. This about when i'm getting the feeling im dreaming. I'm sure i had a very confused look on my face. I then looked down at the horizon and noticed that it was shimmering very oddly. I looked all around a saw it in every direction. I then panicked and told everyone we had to leave NOW! When i glance back i see what the shimmering was: a giant wall of water rushing towards us.

I look back at my family and very quietly say "it's too late." I had one more second for a last breath of air and then WHOOSH the water swept us all away and i woke up.

All i could think about was the cataclysmic flood and the name of the movie.."the coming summer". Might just be a hurricane season to remember huh?

Sunday, January 20, 2008

Les bon temps bitches.

It's been a while, but things have defninitely been busy.  The new year is here and I'm getting started on my first mardi gras.  Last night was the Krewe de Vieux which was a parade held in the marigny.  It was basically a reason for everyone who owned giant fake tits or dicks to put those items to good use.  I shouldn't forget to mention there was a lot of fake spooge and condoms as well.  Oh and there were some brass bands i think.

January

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

sailing the seas of cheese

wow so september 25th huh? i apologize all over myself to myself for myself...in myself.

well the silence has been golden actually. my new apt. is MUCH more compatible.






Also, across the street is a huge warehouse where a few of the mardi gras floats are being made.





Halloween was awesome. Frenchman st. in the Marigny was out of control. The streets were ass to crotches the entire night. I lost my group nearly 40 minutes into the night and thanks to the tendency for New Orleans streets to end and begin randomly at different locations i was unable to find them. I did however, run into some more friends and resumed the festivities. Amazingly, i didn't get my first drink until 1:30 am (i'll let you imagine what the bars were like to produce that result) however, new orleans doesn't go to sleep so there was plenty of time to play catch up...and i did...like van damme gettin his ass whooped for 30 minutes only to charge back and quadruple kick some gorilla sized asian to death.

there is no documentation of this.

The bad news was i was not able to take Burgess home with me since he is not built for 2. I had to abandon him in the marigny and take a cab which was probably best b/c when i started getting uneasy about the direction the cab was taking i started spouting directions that were 180 degrees wrong. God knows where me and Burgess would have ended up.

Then there is a funny story about how i returned for burgess and believed him to be stolen. He was not. I found him a couple weeks later. That story is not nearly as entertaining.

Thanksgiving was awesome. My roommates best friend came over with her boyfriend who is a chef at Vincent's on St. Charles...ever been? K well i had all the staples i was craving: green bean casserole, stuffing and cranberry sauce, "taters... what's taters?" and gravy, apple pie, carrot cake etc... Oh and i guess i shouldn't forget the 4 bottles of wine, bottle of jack, powers whiskey, baileys, and vodka and the 2 cases of beer. Yes there were 4 of us.

Work has been (as i knock feverishly on wood) really nice. My job is unbelievably easy and they pay me for it. Who knew.

Glad to see you all enjoying the holidays. I am hoping to get back that way sometime soon...maybe new years?? I am however carless, so i will likely take the train to atlanta which would require me employing a recon team to retrieve me from the atlanta jungle. I will have more or less information on that matter in the future.

Anyways i got the Secret of Nimh in the mail today so i'll be snuggling up and enjoying this fine piece of animation history. Excuse me, Mrs. Frisby needs my help.

Tuesday, September 25, 2007

i have arrived.

yes. i made it to the boob tube. i was interviewed for the channel 6 news yesterday about theft on magazine street. i saw the clip on the website this morning but i have no idea how to find it. i think they probably took it down, and just as well cuz i sounded like a tool.

on the upside though, 2 young ladies came in looking for the "cute manager" before i got to work. i plan to wring out as much juice from this ever so small bit of notoriety as possible even if there isn't much more than a moist towelette.

on the downsidish, i got a call from LA corporate office right after i got to work. Communications dept. had already heard about the 10 second blip and was calling to inform me of the proper procedures for handling the media. I was terrified, but the lady was nice and said i handled myself well. I just needed to contact her office first before doing anything else like that in the future.

big brother watcheth.

Monday, September 17, 2007

let me clear my throat.

my god yes it has been a month. my diligence has tried and failed.

for posterity and expedience i will try to touch on topics w/o elaboration. any further questioning can be addressed to me directly since you all have my phone number and/or email.

1.) Pop fest. SOOOO worth the trip back to athens. I had an amazing time and was immensely rejuvenated by all your shining familiar faces.

2.) Car crash. I totalled my car after about a week of having it in new orleans. I have redoubled my efforts to turn my turkey legs into some avian legs of even greater girth.

3.) Work. Still goin good. I have received bonuses for July and August for exceptional sales. They were sweating us back in May and June but i had to flex for em. I am still working on getting a staff that i am satisfied with. Have only given one "youre fired" speech and need to give 2 or 3 more, but all in due time.

4.) Play. I am still anxiously awaiting fall league for ultimate but until then a couple of my frisbee buddies have seduced me with the call of touch football league. Also, as a result i have rediscovered pro football now that i have a home team i enjoy rooting for. The falcons never did it for me. Vick was always a douche.

5.) i want this bike. Tell me if you agree.

slideshow funness.

Saturday, August 4, 2007

hesitant anxiety

Well i'll be in good ole athens come this time next week. I'm definitely looking forward to my first official popfest after years of missing "da plane". I am also looking forward to a little bit of travelling for my summer wanderlust. I believe the 8 or 9 hour drive will definitely satisfay that craving for a while.

I am a little hesitant however. The circumstances on my departure were a little weird involving a few people in town and im dreading any awkward run ins. People that i know/knew intimately and to some extent more so than their own friends and family have become more or less ghosts of my memories. It's been such a short time but the spanse seems like years. Time and memory seem to take on much different relations to my experience when im living as opposed to being alive.

One of these such "strangers" has recently requested a very unexpected favor of me. The nature of which i could have never predicted and to be completely honest a part of me feels like i was "the last option". On one hand i feel it would be not only burdensome, probably inappropriate considering our current relationship status, and awkward. On the other, i do feel somewhat obligated and to a fair degree, happy to do this favor.

I've obviously made no decision and will likely go back and forth on it before hammering something to the wall and using my trusty "yes" and "no" dart, i'll settle things decidedly.

In lighter news: i have gained 5 pounds. I don't know if i've mentioned this already however my swelling pride at such news has made me blurt it out randomly every few minutes. It has made conversations awkward on more than one occasion. They can't seem to grasp the weight (HAHA) of the situation. SO yes currently i have broken 130 pounds and upgraded my chicken legs to turkey legs. The arms still resemble angel hair, but an old lady that came into the store gave me a pitiable spaghetti arm compliment so who knows.

Tuesday, July 24, 2007

you were my boy blue!

well it was a bittersweet weekend.

i started things off leaving friday night through some HELLACIOUS weather to go to Ft. Walton for my mom's family reunion. on the way i called to find out their room number and found out my family dog Trouble had died earlier that day. he was about 17 so his days had been long and fruitful. he wasn't in any serious pain but had bad arthritis. for a dog his age he was in pretty good shape. my mom said she just let him outside that morning and found him dead under his favorite shady spot in the back yard. you could only wish we all died so peacefully.

ft. walton was nice. i got to see a cousin of mine i had not seen for nearly 10 years and his now 4 yr old son julian. they live on a remote island in hawaii in a grass hut. i can not stress to you how literal i am being when i say that. it is a pretty enviable life though i must admit other than the 10 dollars a gallon for milk.

i left the beach and headed back home late sat. night b/c i had my ultimate tourny at 9 am sund. morning. i was not prepared. we played 3 games in the morning from 9 til 1:30ish then broke for lunch. we lost 2 and won 1 during our first portion. not so hot. we ate lunch at an awesome lebonese spot called mona's for lunch then hit the fields at 4 for the last 3 games. all in all, we basically sucked. we have some awesome players and some weak links. i brought my D game (defense) and shut down any chance of deep threats. made some nice interceptions and blocks however i threw a couple away on offense. we were flustered since things just couldn't come together with a few of the players.

every game we lost was pretty close though. story of our season. basically we would work to tie it up or get a lead and then it would get blown. anyways, short story long after a day of ultimate we all went to get trashed on free beer at St. Roch's Tavern. I was already sailing my ship out to sea since we were out of the tournament by late afternoon and i began drinking asap. i ended up eating bbq chicken pizza (first chicken in about 3 years i guess) which gave me some glorious poopage the next day.

all in all, it was an awesome time. my team while lacking in wins, brings a serious lush factor to the table. we always had a good time. im already buying new cleats for the fall league and plan to blow this shit wide open.

this time next year i will have a 60 yard hammer throw with laser guided precision.